As Tuesday approaches, many of us in Florida are contemplating a very serious question: how many dead people are going to vote this week? Yes, I said “dead people.” Over the past several decades, Florida has been forced to embrace a new tradition of allowing dead people to vote in the general election. There are counties that boast 186% voter turnout (I’m not kidding at all)! Sadly, the dead in Florida tend to vote straight ticket – all for the same party (usual not the same party they voted for when alive, by the way).
Lawyers have argued that it’s a civil rights issue to attempt to remove the dead from the eligible voter roles in the state (think about that one for a minute). But no one ever talks about exactly HOW the dead cast their vote (especially those who have been dead for decades). Visions of horror movies fill my mind as I contemplate their election day participation. Wouldn’t you love to be a poll watcher at a cemetery? How would the press conduct its exit interviews?
The Dead Vote has been known to have a profound impact on Florida elections lately. I don’t know how up-to-date the dead are with the candidates and issues surrounding this coming election, but I sincerely hope that they vote responsibly like any other good, informed voter.
Good luck, candidates! May the dead be with you!