Historically, I don’t attend funerals. It’s not because I’m without compassion for those who have suffered a loss; far from it.  But I believe that grief is a very personal thing.  I don’t believe that I should have to be on display when I’m grieving, and I don’t like watching others have to display their grief to satisfy the opinions of others.  I actually had a cousin of mine (a clergyman, mind you) tell me that I didn’t love my father because I didn’t display enough grief to satisfy this cousin at my father’s funeral!  I reminded him that how I choose to grieve, publically and privately, for my father is my business and is not the business of or open for comment by anyone else.  This is one of the reasons that my will prohibits having a funeral service of any kind when it’s my time to go.  I want people who choose to grieve for me to do so privately.  But I’d never push my opinions on others regarding funerals. Some people need the service to say goodbye, and some families need to be surrounded by loved ones while they’re grieving.  I respect this, and all I ask is that they respect my desire to grieve privately.

In the last month, I have attended more funerals than I have in the last three decades.  And while the services were beautiful, the last one will, unfortunately, be remembered more for the aftermath than for the beauty of the occasion.  Every member of my household got terribly sick (two colds, one flu, and one sinus infection).  Two weeks later and we’re only just now finally getting over it all.  I find this interesting because the same thing happened at the last funeral I attended (which was also in Texas, but was more than 20 years ago).  I’m detecting a pattern.  I think I’ll avoid attending any more funerals for quite a while.


About wbspeirjr

Award-winning author William Speir was born in Birmingham, Alabama in 1962. His first published work is the 2015 "Muzzle-Loading Artillery for Reenactors." In addition to his artillery manual, William has published 19 novels, including a 9-book action-adventure series ("The Knights of the Saltire Series"), five historical novels ("King’s Ransom," "The Saga of Asbjorn Thorleikson," "Nicaea - The Rise of the Imperial Church," "Arthur, King," and "The Besieged Pharaoh"), one fantasy novel ("The Kingstone of Airmid"), one science fiction novel ("The Olympium of Bacchus 12"), one geo-political thriller ("The Trinity Gambit"), and a stand-alone action-adventure novel ("Shiko Unleashed"). William is a 5-time Royal Palm Literary Award winner: 2014 Second Place Unpublished Historical Fiction for "King’s Ransom," 2015 Second Place Unpublished Historical Fiction for "The Saga of Asbjorn Thorleikson," 2017 Second Place Published Historical Fiction for "Arthur, King," 2017 First Place Published Historical Fiction for "Nicaea - The Rise of the Imperial Church," and 2017 First Place Published Science Fiction for "The Olympium of Bacchus 12." William currently serves as the Chief Operating Officer of Progressive Rising Phoenix Press, LLC. For more information about William Speir, please visit his website at
This entry was posted in Odds and Ends and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s